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I thought of having my ego inflated today, much in lines with my inclination towards objectivism and epistemological concepts. It was fine until I gave in to a meek surrender to the sharp edge of the frivolous worry of being mocked at. I expected an enlightening burst but it was rather a slow venting out of the charged matter, a ramification, of my throttling delusions. I was back to square-one again.

I guess I misunderstood myself and thought myself of being good and worthy enough to be called as a grown up and a matured; no idea if 19 years are enough to make me a rational human being. I have been trying to get maturity into my sub-consciousness to make it spontaneously wise and obnoxiously impressive – objectivism you see. I have often won over these cheeky attempts to beget a grown-up look but what confuses me is the reason I should fake maturity. Some like to be kids all though the growing process and never want to grow up so I question my loosely knit wisdom if this can ever be worth sacrificing the reality I can live in.

And yeah, the definition of maturity - the period of time in your life after your physical growth has stopped and you are fully developed. Interesting isn’t it? No mention of the mental and emotional development. And whenever I talk about life, love and future, there is always someone out there to say “you are not mature enough to talk this dude”. It’s high time then that we define what exactly becoming mature and grown up means.

(So all you mature aunts and uncles, you’ve got some serious work to do to help out your juniors. Your so called mature comments shall be appreciated.)

Actually here is a problem with some uncanny and illogical translation in what the message conveys. There are several instances of this kind and the level of misunderstanding is enormous. Let me work around a few of them.

Some times I am considered a threat by some very wise people who can’t show a little understanding and care towards immature guys like me. I wonder what makes them believe that I intend to harm them or confuse them. They don’t know how sensitive I become at times. A few days back I saw a barbaric act by a mosquito digging into my skin and sucking blood shamelessly. I did nothing. It was just trying to quench it’s bloody thirst – it was filling it’s stomach just to continue living. I couldn’t even shoo it away for if I had done it, I would have felt guilty for it later.

Some people even don’t show wisdom in saying ‘no’ to me. They don’t even have the simple etiquettes to answer a phone call. They can’t understand I just wanted to talk and was in no way asking for any commitment. Or was it just another misunderstanding – a wrong translation of my intention in action?

May be we all are different people but that’s what this whole story is all about. Being different is the key to progress. How can we expect similarities to explain diversified living habits and choices? Differences are for celebrating and not for proclaiming.

Lately I got interested in being objectivistic and ruthless. Studying epistemology, metaphysics, politics, ethics, and aesthetics was really absorbing giving me a high form of satisfaction. I want to create a synergy with objectivism and religion how pretty aware of the objections and verbal abuses I may be bombarded with. But how can I explain that this is how the things work? I mean I have a full right over what I believe as long as I m under the shadow of my faith in God almighty. And I want to show my faith because faith is belief in action. There are bound to be many misunderstandings – wrong translations for that matter.

All these wrong translations put forth only one valid explanatory reason. It is the human nature to speculate and assume facts much of it may not at all be truth. These assumptions have helped scientists achieve great knowledge on the workings of complex systems but the speculatory assumption I have a grudge against, are the ones that cannot explain the complex human natures.

People should understand that there are things beyond what they think can exist. Their thinking has been blinded by the mediocrity they have been seeing in their past lives. Credentials on the wall never make us a good person. Goodness in understanding others makes us good.

As I have already mentioned in one of my old postings (A Story – Distract and Cheat), I again stress its meaning at depth. I had said "The more pure a feeling gets the more unrequited and unbelievable it becomes. It is often ridiculed too. There is no room for purity beyond a particular limit. And I call this limit as life. You understand this sort of limpidness, and you understand life. But I do pray for you that you never have a tryst with this wholesomeness. It takes away "life" from you." Now I will not explain what this really means, all I will say is that this is all I mean.

Please don’t commit a misunderstanding again. It will just be a repetition of an eccentric translation.

© 2006 ZUBAIR